Self-Compassion
Did you know that self-compassion makes you a better leader? I read a great article by Rich Fernandez and Steph Stern in the Harvard Business Review that spoke to this very point.
Sometimes we all lack in this department. Some are even wired to BE hard on themselves - have unrealistic expectations, critical recordings in their head….
The issue is that if we treat ourselves in this manner, we have a higher probability to treat others the same way.
Their concise article was jammed packed. Here is an excerpt that I found most compelling:
“The amount of research on self-compassion has grown significantly over the past fifteen years, and studies show that the benefits align with several important leadership skills.
Emotional Intelligence: Studies indicate that people who exercise self-compassion have higher levels of emotional intelligence, are better able to maintain calm when flustered, and tend to experience more happiness and optimism.
Resilience: Kristin Neff’s research and that of others shows that self-compassionate people have standards as high as people who lack self-compassion, but that those with high self-compassion are less likely to be unduly and unproductively hard on themselves if they didn’t meet their own standards. Self-compassion supports you as you navigate setbacks, regain clarity, and move forward productively.
Growth Mindset: Studies from Neff and colleagues indicate that highly self-compassionate people are more oriented toward personal growth. Rather than avoid challenges, they are more likely to formulate specific plans to reach their goals.
Integrity: Research shows a strong link between self-compassion and conscientiousness and accountability, suggesting that self-compassion enables leaders to act responsibly and morally, even when undertaking difficult decisions.
Compassion Toward Others: As the UC-Berkeley professor of psychology Serena Chen writes, “Self-compassion and compassion for others are linked… Being kind and nonjudgmental toward the self is good practice for treating others compassionately.” Leaders who are able to model compassion for themselves and others build trust and psychological safety that leads to higher engagement and sustainable high performance in teams and organizations.”
It’s amazing what self-compassion can do for leaders!
The upside is that even the ones wired to be hard on themselves and be rewired. It does take some time and often some help, but you’re well worth investment.
