What Can Be Done About Toxic Team Behaviors? Part 2

I started this series two weeks ago in case you want to start at the beginning.

This series is on four specific toxic behaviors. We’re looking at each one. See if you recognize them, and the effects they have had for you, on you, in your relationship, or on your team.

Today, we’ll explore STONEWALLING.

Characteristics of Stonewalling:

1.    Emotional Shutdown: Individuals who engage in stonewalling typically shut down emotionally during a conversation. They may become unresponsive, avoid eye contact, or display a lack of interest.

2.    Silent Treatment: Stonewallers may employ the silent treatment, refusing to communicate at all or responding with minimal words, making it difficult to resolve conflicts.

3.    Avoidance of Discussion: Rather than addressing issues, stonewallers avoid the topic altogether, which prevents open and constructive communication.

4.    Physical Withdrawal: Stonewalling can also manifest as physically leaving the room, avoiding eye contact, or using distractions to escape the conversation.

Effects of Stonewalling:

1.    Communication Breakdown: Stonewalling prevents healthy communication and dialogue. It obstructs the sharing of feelings, concerns, and perspectives, which can lead to misunderstanding and unresolved issues.

2.    Increased Tension: When one person stonewalls, the other party might feel increasingly frustrated, unheard, and dismissed. This can escalate conflicts and tension in relationships or teams.

3.    Isolation and Alienation: Stonewalling creates emotional distance and can lead to feelings of isolation and loneliness, both for the person stonewalling and the person/people being stonewalled.

4.    Escalation of Issues: Without addressing problems through effective communication, conflicts and concerns might escalate and become more difficult to resolve over time.

5.    Deterioration of Trust: Stonewalling erodes trust within relationships and teams. When people feel dismissed or ignored, trust in the relationship diminishes.

Addressing Stonewalling:

1.    Encourage Open Dialogue: Create a safe and nonjudgmental space for communication. Encourage individuals to express their thoughts and feelings without fear of being ignored or dismissed.

2.    Set Boundaries: Make it clear that stonewalling is not an acceptable way to handle conflicts. Establishing healthy communication norms helps prevent this behavior from becoming a default response.

3.    Practice Active Listening: Encourage both parties to actively listen and empathize with each other's perspectives. This can help foster understanding and reduce the need for stonewalling.

4.    Take Breaks: Sometimes, taking a short break during a heated discussion can be helpful to cool down emotions. However, ensure that both parties agree to resume the conversation after the break.

5.    Seek Professional Help: If stonewalling persists and negatively impacts relationships or teams, seeking the guidance of a coach can provide valuable strategies for improving communication.

Stonewalling can be damaging to relationships and team dynamics. Addressing this behavior involves fostering a culture of open communication, empathy, and active listening, while setting boundaries that discourage the use of stonewalling as a means of avoiding difficult conversations.

As always, if you’d like to learn more, schedule a time.